Wow! You're Gonna Have Your Hands Full!!!

Now that Sophie is a little older, I'm a little more comfortable with two kids, and Leila is a little more communicative (or has fine tuned her selective hearing), we're venturing out more.  The grocery store trips don't intimidate me quite as much as they used to; lessons are something to look forward to again and not something to dread (though it's still hard to always get there on time!); and a stroll around the neighborhood is almost shoulder-shrug easy...almost.

And since we're out and about more, we're getting "noticed" more.  Now, I'll always tell you that we - and by we, I mostly mean Sophie and Leila - are getting noticed because we're a beautiful bunch of gals...but my realistic side will tell you it's because Leila is usually being such a quirkball that it's almost impossible NOT to notice her and Sophie is usually in some sort of babywearing carrier which isn't exactly common.

We get the "oooohs" and the "aaaaaahs".  I get the "Boy or girl?" question all the time (Sophie is a baldy with blue eyes so I like to dress her in blue...so sue me).  I get the "How cute are your babies?" to which I always proudly respond "So freakin' adorable, right?"  Occasionally, I'll even get, "Wow!  Your babies are so good!"  (My response:  Of course they are!  They're my babies!)

Inevitably, during all these exchanges, the admirers/curious strangers/little old biddies always ask how old each of my girls are.  "Leila is 22 months and Sophie is 3.5 months...They're about 18.5 months apart."  Upon hearing that, I'm usually left with these pearls of wisdom to ponder as the gawker walks away....really, verbal gems if you will..."Wow!!  You're gonna have your hands full!"


Now, when people first said that to me (especially during my pregnancy with Sophie when people would ask me how far apart my bebes would be) I would get defensive.  I'm not gonna lie.  I have a quick temper and one of the fastest ways for it to rear its ugly head is when people question/comment about my decisions...especially ones I can't change...pregnancy being one of them.  I would respond with: Oh no, I'll be fine.  Everything will be fine.  The age difference isn't that bad...it'll be fine.  The girls will love each immensely and have a built-in playmate and they'll be fine.  (See a pattern developing?)

Then, I would get worried.  Did I make a mistake having my girls so close?  What if it wouldn't be fine?  What if they were so close together I couldn't handle a newborn and a toddler?  What if they tagged team me and I gave in?  What if they end up hating each other because they were so close together?  What if, what if, what if?

Then, one day recently, it hit me.  My hands are full.  And now I smile.  Because when I hear "You're gonna have your hands full!" I think, yeah, I really am...My hands will be full when:

-I'm busy feeding Sophie and sweet Leila brings me a towel and a paci and the phone and a drink and some snacks all to make me comfortable and happy...and I don't even have to ask for them...

-I'm wearing Sophie in a carrier on one side and swinging Leila around and around for an impromptu Adele Kitchen Dance Party....

-I'm reading to Leila on my lap, with Sophie on her lap, and the large picture book balanced in one hand while the other hovers "just in case"...

-I'm fixing a bottle for Sophie and Leila is entertaining her sister by imitating a lion's roar....

-I'm being passed a washcloth, soap, and towel by the helpful big sister while little sister is getting a bath....

-I'm being pulled frantically towards the stairs by Leila when "Sophie cry! Sophie cry!" and Mommy needs to help her....

-I'm holding up the camera to capture the sweet moments of Leila showing Sophie all her Little People and making each one give Sophie a kiss on the cheek...

-I'm folding them in prayer and look over to see Leila's hands folded as well....then hear a resounding "AAAAAAAAAAAMEN!" when the prayer has ended...

-I'm folding laundry and the burp cloths disappear and end up on Sophie's head as "they're for baby!"....

And hopefully, one day in the near future, my hands will be full of my girls' hands, each holding Mommy tightly...


So yeah, my hands are full.  And I'm so very blessed that they are.

"I love the Terrible Twos!"

...said no sane mother ever...

My sweet, adorable, wonderful, willing to please Leila has now become a stubborn, resistant, precocious, semi-defiant two year old.  Somedays, as she's laying on the floor crying because there is no Mickey or because I didn't get to her snack fast enough, I look at her think, "Whatwhat? Where is my sweet baby girl, and who are you?"

It's amazing how fast the transformation came around.  She was still her happy-go-lucky self as of two months ago, then BAM!  Welcome to the not-so-pretty-side of toddlerhood.

Don't get me wrong - she's still a sweetie.  She's incredibly gentle with her baby sister; she still gives out hugs and kisses like no one's business; she still likes to grab my hand to pull her down on the floor to play.  But now, on top of those sweet things, we also have temper tantrums when I dare utter the word "nap"; instant tears when Mickey is over (like Mommy really controls Disney Junior?); the word "No!" screamed at a decibel only dogs can hear when I am ridiculous enough to suggest eating a vegetable (you'd think I'd learn quicker, huh?).

I get how some specific things set her off, I really do.  For instance, I understand not wanting to nap when it's gorgeous outside and you'd rather be hitting bubbles with a stick....or not wanting to eat a vegetable because it looks like a tree and honestly, who wants to eat a tree?...or not wanting Mickey to end because he's your best friend and you've even learned to dance like him...I try to master these situations with patience and gentleness (who am I kidding here?) but sometimes, nothing works.

What I really don't get is the things that set her off that seem completely and incredibly ridiculous to me.  Prime example:
Me:  "Leila, smile for the camera!"
Her:  "AAAAAAAAGGGGHHHH!!!!"
(For those of you without toddlers, that translates to:  Help!  Mommy's trying to suck my soul out with the demon box!  Run for you life!!  Daddy would never do this to me!!  ENGAGE COMPLETE MELTDOWN MODE!!!)

I know this is a phase, and that "This too shall pass."  Well, as much as people warn me not to wish my life away, I will admit sometimes I wish this phase of her life away...or at least, away for a day.

An encouraging thought for me during this Terrible Two's Toddlerhood Moment:  God does not give you more than you can handle...which makes me happy because, according to Leila and her mood swings, God must think I'm a superstrong WonderWoman! :)

*In the spirit of the post, I thought I'd share one of Leila's "lovelier" moments...  :)  (Mean Mommy - I know)*

Protesting Mommy taking a picture...What could I have been thinking?

Mommy of Two

Two girls now run my household...and before you ask, no, I am not one of them.  This honor belongs to my 20 month old Leila and my almost 2 month old Sophie.  I just try to keep them fed, clothed, bathed, and then hang on for the rest of the ride.

I read a lot of research before we had Sophie about adding another child to a family: how to balance/split your time between two, how to establish a routine early, how to help your older child adjust to a new little one...and let me tell you, none of it helped.  As good as the intentions were of the authors, I feel like nothing I read could truly prepare me for what our family would become.  Partly because no one besides us knows our family dynamic, our personalities, etc., and partly because reading something and experiencing something is completely different.  COMPLETELY.  

Though I have been beyond lucky to have my mom able to stay with us after Sophie's birth and help us get adjusted, I still struggle with things I never did before...like getting out of the house on time (which if you know how early I like to be everywhere, this is very exasperating for me), remembering to eat myself (the girls never let me forget when it's time for them to eat, but it keeps slipping my mind), finishing a book (in all my free time...that's a joke).  And then there's the conundrum of bedtime: How do I get Leila through her bedtime routine and still keep Sophie content?  So many small things that I need to figure out before my mom leaves, and if I stop and think about it, I truly get overwhelmed...

But, my mother in all her infinite wisdom, left me pondering a little gem of wisdom today.  During one of my many moments when I was doubting my competence of a mom of two, she said, "Rachel, here's what's important.  That your girls are healthy, well-loved, and happy.  At the end of the day, as long as those three things are taken care of, then it doesn't matter that you didn't sweep your floors."  (Not 100% true as Pepper sheds like none other so I have to sweep daily, but the sentiment remains.)  

But I really stopped and reflected on her words today.  Yes, I like a clean house, all the laundry done, the dishes put away, and a nice dinner on the table by the time Devin walks in the door, but in the long run, does that matter?  Will the girls remember that they continuously had dog hair clinging to their socks, or will they remember that Mommy stopped folding laundry to build a tower, have an Adele dance party, or push them around the house on a train?  

I wish I was SuperMom - the one that could do everything and anything - run the perfect household, make gourmet dinners every night, plan educational and engaging activities everyday for my kids, and still make time for herself and others.  Fact of the matter is: I'm not, nor will I ever be.

But I am Mommy - the one that shows up late to doctors appointment because we had to tear the house apart for Leila's comfort toy, the one that burned dinner because she was too busy dancing like a lunatic in the living room while making her girls laugh, the one who showed up to her meeting without showering first because she had to have an All Girls snuggle in bed with her favorite ladies.  And while there will be many frustrating and hard moments as I adjust to my new role of Mommy of Two Girls, I can only hope that I will tackle them with grace, determination, patience, kindness, love, and a whole lotta trust in God that He will get us through.  

Mommy of Two.  That's who I now am.  

Vacation!!

Wow, these last two months have really flown by!  I kept meaning to sit down and update the blog, but then something would pop up, and I kept putting it off.  Oh well, here I am now, and I'll crank out an update before I run off to the dentist.  :)

Let's see.  At the beginning of November, Mom, Sarah, Leila, and I went to Virginia Beach for a week.  It was awesome!  We spent a lot of time shopping, exploring new places, eating out, and going to the aquarium and zoo.  Leila was such a trooper, and was completely fascinated by the aquarium.  We called Daddy when we were done and said we wanted a shark, a blowfish, and a sea anemone for Christmas.  (He might have just laughed at us.)  But she was completely mesmerized, and would stare at the fish for ten minutes...which is a lot when your average attention span is only 2-3 minutes.  Here are some pictures from the aquarium and other adventures from the week.

Fascinated by the turtles

Looking at the sharks swimming overhead

Dressed like Kermit the Frog to go out for that day

Acting like a monkey with Grandma at the zoo

We went down to the beach for one afternoon (which is surprisingly good for us, as none of the Florek women actually like the beach) and Leila must have inherited that dislike from us.  She screamed and cried and whined and begged a passerby to be adopted...all to get away from the ocean.  We ended that trip rather quickly, and found a small playground on our walk back.  That went over a lot better!

Before the screaming began

Ahhh...a bottle fixes everything!

Headed away from that horrible beach!

She likes the swing!

We had a great time, and can't wait for another Florek women vacation!  Coming next: Thanksgiving festivities!!

Virginia Vacation!

So a lot has happened since my last post...sorry for the infrequent updates, Leila is quite the time consumer!!  Anyways, here's what's been happening with the DeBackers lately:

A very big achievement: Devin passed the bar!!  He is now an official licensed attorney in the state of Virginia, and is currently in the process of applying for a Washington D.C. license.  Leila and I couldn't be prouder!  I've always said my hubby was a genius, and he definitely proved it this summer when his attention was split between bar studying, a very pregnant and very needy wife, and a little newborn.  Devin always continues to amaze me, and this was just another thing to add to the list.  When we found out that he passed, Leila and I put together a "Yay!  Daddy passed the bar!!" package and gave it to him when he got home.  That night, mom babysat while Devin and I had a proper celebratory dinner.

Leila liked the sound of the Skittles box

Yay!  Daddy passed the bar!!

Soon after that, I packed Leila up for our Virginia Vacation!!  (And, just for the record, I always thought I needed a lot of stuff for vacation, but my goodness!!  For being soooo small, she needs a ton of stuff!!)  We drove 12 hours on Thursday to Mom and Dad's house in Chester, and Leila did fabulously on the ride!  She started fussing a little when we neared Waynesboro, but I think she was just sick of the car...I know I was!

On Saturday, Mom, Leila, and I joined my college roommate, her husband, and son for WILLIAM AND MARY HOMECOMING!!  (Can you tell I'm excited about that?!)  Though the game was lame, the day was absolutely enjoyable!!  We all went shopping at the college bookstore - where Leila got her first WM hoodie - waited forever at one of our favorite restaurants, The Cheese Shop, and met Devin's sister, Danielle, for a few minutes.  It was Leila's first football game, and you can tell by the pictures below that she was absolutely enthralled.  (Note the sarcasm.)  It was also the day for another first: Leila's first time holding a boy's hand!!  Everyone has told me to enjoy the moments now because they grow up so fast, but seriously! already holding a boy's hand!  I'm not quite ready for that!! :)

My little cheerleader hanging out at the bookstore

The babies were both asleep for the game...they were clearly enthralled!

Me, Leila, my roommate Julie, her baby Alex, and her hubby Scott

Leila and Alex holding hands - way too early for that!!!

Leila was such a trooper for Homecoming - only cried once during the day, and that was my fault for having butterfingers and not being to put together a bottle fast enough!!  Have I mentioned that I have such a good baby!!

The next day, we all went to church - another first for Leila.  Lil'Bit tried hard, but was somewhat overwhelmed by the loud music and it's almost impossible to keep a three month old quiet for an entire hour.  So she and I spent part of service hanging out in the childrens' wing and in the lobby.  That's okay; it was good going back to church and introducing Leila to some family friends.

All ready for church!!

The  next two weeks here involve craft fairs, a week at Virginia Beach, visiting Sarah and Daddy at work, Fall Festivals, seeing Devin at a conference, meeting friends, visiting Lightfoot, and anything else that pops into my head.  It's gonna be a fun-filled Virginia Vacation!!

Visit from the Grandparents

The weather this past week has been good for one thing: curling up on the sofa with a cozy, thick blanket, a cup of hot chocolate, and reading all day.  Normally, I absolutely love these days.  I can just read...I can't see the dust on the furniture, the dog hair on the floors, the dirty clothes gathering up in the laundry room...I can simply read.

Unfortunately, this was not the idea week for this read-only weather because the GRANDPARENTS were here!  Though I know they are more interested in spending time with Leila than with me these days, I always love a visit from my parents.  ;)  They so nicely came to keep me company as Devin spent the week in Del Rio, Texas for work.  Because the weather was so dreary, we spent our time indoors: shopping for clothes for Leila (and please no comments on the fact that she has more than 100 outfits already), exploring the little towns outside of Florence, going out to eat, and honestly, just enjoying each other's company.

Dinner at Fava's Restaurant in Georgetown, Kentucky

Some of the highlights of the week included:

-Leila's first time in a restaurant:  On Monday, we were famished from our shopping trip so we decided to go to Olive Garden.  She did wonderfully!!  (And by "wonderfully" I mean, she had no idea she was in a restaurant because she slept the whole time.)

-The Flea Market in Georgetown:  Daddy did some research and found a flea market that boasted being "the best in the area!"  Always up for an adventure, we loaded Lil'Bit in the car and drove the 30 minutes to Georgetown...or at least, Daddy thought it was supposed to be 30 minutes, but it was, in fact, an hour.  And when we arrived, man, were we disappointed.  It was so gross that Mom walked through next to me threatening bodily harm if I let anything touch the stroller.  We decided to leave very, very quickly and ended up exploring the downtown area full of quaint little shops.  Our afternoon was salvaged thanks to a cute kids store and a diner named Fava's.

-Kinman Farms:  On Saturday, we all (including Devin!) went to the Fall Festival at Kinman Farms.  Though the festival wasn't all that great, it was a fun afternoon as the weather finally warmed up and dried out and we took some fun pictures in the pumpkin patch.  We then, once again, explored another small town with shops and decided to eat at a little diner/pub.  It was there that I discovered this:

The Kentucky Hot Brown

Yes, I know it looks like a plate of pig slop, but it's the best ugly-meal I've ever had!  You're looking at Texas toast, layered with turkey and ham, smothered in melted cheese, and topped with bacon, tomatoes, parmesan cheese, and a roll.  So freakin' good!

There were so many good times had this week, and despite the fact that all times were great times, I definitely have a favorite memory.  Ever since I was a little girl, Saturdays were meant for garage sales with Daddy.  I was Daddy's companion, and I cherished those early morning father/daughter times.  In college, I would come home on the weekends just to go to garage sales, and I continued that through the first three years of marriage traveling from Charlottesville to Chester just to go.  I was saddened when Devin and I moved to Kentucky because that meant no more garage sales with Daddy on Saturday mornings; there was no way I was going by myself because that's just not how it was supposed to happen.  So imagine how happy I was Friday night when Daddy reminded me what time I had to get up to hit the garage sales with him the next morning.  Such a small thing, but it's something that brings me such joy.  I hope Devin and Leila have something that's just theirs that she will love and look forward to as much as I love going to garage sales with my Daddy.

And, to close out this somewhat long post, here are a few pictures from the pumpkin patches at Kinman Farms:

My little pumpkin

Family fun times - check out Leila's piggy hat!

Leila with Grandma and Grandpa

The little John Deere Baby!

Oktoberfest Festivities!

So, not too much has happened over the past two weeks.  I have discovered that Leila likes to go "swimming" (aka splashing around in the bathtub full of water) and we've had fun taking a few swims.  She likes to try to push off the bottom of the "pool" and loves to smack her fists on top of the water.

Going swimming!

One of the highlights over the last two weeks is going to Oktoberfest in Cincinnati.  Apparently, it's the largest Oktoberfest in the country, and second in the world only to the Oktoberfest celebration in Germany...at least, that's what the website claimed.  Devin, Leila, and I went and experienced music, entertainment, lots and lots of people, and, the most important of all, German food.  Leila wasn't impressed with it very much, but Devin and I had a lot of fun!

Throughout the entire time we were there, Leila was holding Devin's fingers and never let go.  It was by far the cutest thing ever...I think it's because he was the only familiar thing in that environment for her, and she was holding on for dear life.  Anyways, here are a few shots from the festival!

Leila was not impressed

Family fun

Sleeping Beauty

Snuggling with Mom

Wide eyed on the car trip home